Firstly this is more of a journal entry than a post, a way of marking my little milestones and celebrating change. I understand everyone feels differently!
It started with the half of 2016 before summer, that left me content on the inside but not wanting to really leave my safe-haven of a room to do anything with anybody else. I was perfectly content just scraping by my deadlines and chilling in my PJ's talking to nobody.
By leaving my comfort zone I don't mean the time we camped wild in Scotland for two nights, or the time I plucked up the courage to chat about my teenage eating disorder (as scary as that was), I mean baby steps. Big things that seem little to others.
I attended two blogging events this last month- if you told me at the start of this year that I was going to do this I'd be like AWWWW HELL NAW (or in reality I'd say yes then probably flake out from nerves or fatigue last minute). I got on the train all alone, navigated my way very badly to an event and made conversation with strangers and GUESS WHAT HAPPENED? Nothing bad.
Nothing bad at all. Lots of good though; new friends, visiting new places, new experiences and a sense of pride on the way home that I could have flaked out or ran away scared but I didn't! Every time I get out of my comfort zone now, although nerve-wracking at first, my self-confidence that I can do it is stronger. I'm stronger!
Another stretch out of my comfort zone has been orchestrating presentations and leading groups at uni. As a teen at school I'd do ANYTHING to avoid being picked as the 'leader', not wanting to be seen as bossy, or for the fact I was just too shy to tell these people what to do I'd step away from any leadership role completely.
Not this time buddy. Come at me third year, with your one presentation a week (thus far, kill me) and hand me all the slides you've got because I've got time. And I've got newfound confidence that I can do this- again even when I want to poop my pants at the thought of presenting to a class, I realise that this little area outside of my comfort zone will soon become something I am comfortable with.
The more I do that terrifies me, the easier it becomes to do these things. I've figured that for me, it's all about summoning the courage to bite the bullet.
If you follow me on Twitter you'll probably know that I had to get a filling last month (weird that people online know about what's inside my teeth but anyway) and was sulking over it, swimming in a fear of the dentist that I've had for years but GUESS WHAT AGAIN? I did it and nothing bad happened.
As uncomfortable as it was at first to have a needle in my gum, ask strangers for directions in Manchester and worry what people at the Bloggers Blog Awards thought of me, nothing bad occurred. Stepping out of my comfort zone is becoming easier.
Now I know that if I ever want to do these things again that I can, even if the nerves still sit in my tummy. Realistically, I'm never going to screw up so monumentally that I can never come back from it. These experiences out of my comfort zone have done me a world of good leading me to realise that putting yourself outside of your circle isn't as hard as it might seem (and boy, it feels so difficult sometimes), just bite the bullet.
Have you been out of your comfort zone lately? How did you feel afterwards?
See my previous Sunday Posts here!
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